Job

So apparently, finding a job has been harder than I thought. Maybe it has something to do with my smart mouth, reckless driving, chain smoking and tattoos.

But besides that:

-I actually am a really hard worker, willing to do whatever bitch work a company will throw at me.
-I have sales, guest service and food prep experience. A little jewelry and electronics experience as well.
-I've worked at many a fast food restaurant and retail stores. I've also worked at movie theaters and been a part time teacher at a martial arts studio.
-I've been babysitting for ten years, I love meeting new people and I can keep a calm demeanor during emergencies. I'm a black belt in Tae Kwon Do, but god knows my grades from college are terrible due to a serious case of adhd and test anxiety.
-I can speak some French, Spanish and Italian (though I'm not fluent in any), and I'm one hell of a shot with a semi-auto pistol (not to toot my own horn or anything).
-Besides two speeding tickets, I'm a damn good driver (especially when it comes to outrunning cops...)
- I can multi-task like no other [No shit: I'm talking on the phone, typing this, listening to music, petting my dog, saving the world (Ok... maybe that's a lie) smoking a cigarette and watching Lord of the Rings at the moment] and what I lack in the 'making good grades' department; I make up for in the 'willingness to learn' and 'clever comebacks' departments.
- I can bullshit my way in or out of just about any situation (Until I start being blatantly honest).
- I can read
- I know my geography (unlike 99% of the fuck-tards I graduated with... Really Darrell? Montana is a state. It's two states above where you are right now to be precise... dumb-ass. <3)
- I know my basic math up to (but not including) calculus (aka: $10.00 - $4.00= Potato?)
- I have big tits.

So why the FUCK have I not been hired yet???

Beats the hell outta me.