Someone Who Cares (Darrell)

Ok Darrell, this one's for you. Why? Because I'm bored. And you want me to tell you what I really think about you, huh? Ok, well here it goes, but I warned you...:

From the first moment I saw you and you're dumb ass brother, Billy; I know you'd be a friend to me. Even if you were wearing that stupid hat and a blue button up shirt while playing basketball. Yes, I even remember what clothes you were wearing that day all those years ago (I can't, however, recall exactly how many years I've known you... kinda sad huh?). Between the two of us, there's enough depression and anger to stimulate a small war. But through everything I've been through; from all my shitty ex-boyfriends, the drugs, the drinking, the self-confidence and the anxiety and the paranoia issues, the late night escapades; the money (that I still have yet to pay back) and the (current) drunken phones calls I make to you every night and (finally) the lack of emotions I have-- You've always been there for me. You're the one person who has stuck out a friendship with me (even over Jasmine) and you've never let me down. In this dark hole that is my mind; you're one of the few people I still care about.

I don't have to lie or kiss your ass. I never have to worry about you having my back because you always have. You've always been very considerate too me (even though you're a relentless flirt), and you've been my shoulder to cry on for many years. You're not the brightest crayon in the box, but it only adds to your character. I hate your beard... really. I can't stand it... you look like a creeper... but don't worry. When I get to Colorado I'll be sure to tie you down and shave the damn thing off (than again, you might like that too much.) I only wish that I could do for you what you've done for me. You keep me sane... and i don't mean that in a joking way. You honest to god keep me from becoming a psychopathic bitch and serial killer. My trust in people is low and it always has been... while I wish I could say that I trust you... I can't. At least not without lying. I know that you'll respect that. You'll understand.. but part of me wishes that I had the capacity to trust people especially so I could trust you.

I heard somewhere that some friendships are so strong, that they can transgress lifetimes. I instantly thought of you. And thank god... cause if I died tomorrow I could count on you being there in my next lifetime :). Have I ever considered a relationship with you? For a fleeting moment. You're not my type by any means. But you'll find someone someday who's gonna deserve all the love and respect that you radiate... and I better be your best (wo)man damn it! I really look forward to seeing you this summer and I know that if my mom or her douche of a boyfriend kick me out of their house that you'll be there for me.

Darrell... I love you man.

There I said it.

I said the 'L' word.. happy?

Well you better be because it's true.

One day I'll get you back and I'll be there for you and I'll be the one helping you out. You'll owe me money someday and I'll be there to make damn sure it happens!

There's a song by Three Days Grace that I get stuck in my head every once in a while called "Someone Who Cares". The lyrics go like this:

Every street in this city
Is the same to me
Everyone's got a place to be
But there's no room for me
Am I to blame?
When the guilt and the shame hang over me
Like a dark cloud,
That chases you down in the pouring rain.

It's so hard to find someone
Who cares about you,
But it's easy enough to find someone
Who looks down on you

Why is it so hard to find someone
Who cares about you?
When it's easy enough to find someone
Who looks down on you

It's not what it seems
When you're not on the scene
There's a chill in the air
But there's people like me
That nobody sees so nobody cares

Why is it so hard to find someone
Who cares about you?
When it's easy enough to find someone
Who looks down on you
 
Why is it so hard to find someone
Who can keep it together
When you've come undone?
 
Why is it so hard to find someone
Who cares about you?

I swear this time it won't turn out
The same 'cause now I've got myself to blame
And you'll know where we'll end up
On the streets that is easy enough
To find someone who looks down on you

Why is it so hard to find someone
Who cares about you?
When it's easy enough to find someone
Who looks down on you
 
Why is it so hard to find someone
Who can keep it together
When you've come undone?
 
Why is it so hard to find someone
Who cares about you?


Darrell: You're the person who cares about me. You're the person who can keep it together when I've come undone. So this one goes out to you.

I love you man.

Thanks.